Palm Leaves and Skinned Toes Make the Toga

Oh, uh, I think I made my decision about the next president. Not that I'm stoked about either one, but there have been some honorable mistakes (choices) that will be enshrined in the great hall soon. It is so Dukakis--He should not have quit and then get back in the race; that kind of huge mistake.

On a different note, I had conversations today that we're quite fascinating. What if Jesus did come back?

EXT/INT - YOU DECIDE - ANYTIME
WELL, LET'S SAY SUNDAY

The congregation is surprised by the sudden appearance of Jesus (you know him).

CONGREGATION
(shocked)
Gasp!

An evenly astonished Jesus moves his head back-and-forth.

Jesus
(shocked, yo)
What are you people doing?! Wha?
All these churches, and ..., you do
know you're breaking a cardinal rule,
don't you? You know, not worshiping
anyone but God..., my father!?

Jesus begins to pace around the pulpit.

Jesus
All this weird stuff about me, and the gold.
Gold? Why so much? All because of me? This
is why I've been gone for so long.

He stops pacing.

Jesus
It's creepy. The only reason I'm down here
now is because that Tammy chick is
stalking me.

Suddenly, an angel appears behind Jesus in the guise of Tammy Fay Baker.

Tammy
(make like Fran Drescher)
Oh, Jesus, there you are! Come here
with those locks and let me stroke them!

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That's enough of that.